(via littlepoetonspring)Source: txla
1. There will be several days that you daydream about stepping in front of a city bus. Don’t. It will not be beautiful. It will not be brave. It will be selfish. It will be broken. Your mother will cry.
2. Don’t write for him. Write for you. Write for others like you. Write so the girl that thinks about stepping in front of public transportation doesn’t. Don’t be selfish.
3. When you will yourself to sleep and it doesn’t come- get up. It doesn’t matter that it’s 3 am. There will be other 3 am’s. Take a shower. Take two. Wash him out of your hair. Write a poem. Read the same book you’ve read 202 times again. The 203rd time might tell you something different. Don’t stay in bed- you will think about the bus again.
4. Don’t kiss him because he’s broken. Don’t kiss him because his laughter never reaches his eyes. Don’t try and fix him. Fix yourself first. Be selfish. He can’t save you.
5. Date yourself. Take yourself out to eat. Don’t share your popcorn at the movies with anyone. Stroll around an art museum alone. Fall in love with canvases. Fall in love with yourself.
6. Dress up and wear red lipstick and get drunk with your friends. They’re the ones that will pick you up. Don’t kiss him. Or him. Don’t fall asleep on strange couches with strange boys. When his hand slides up your dress walk away. Hit him. Don’t kiss him. He can’t save you.
7. Get another tattoo. Get five more. Get another hole in your ear. Don’t listen to your dad. You will still be able to get a job. Did you really want to be employed by someone like your father? Haven’t you had enough of judgmental old white men anyway? Get fuck you tattooed in tiny letters on your hip.
8. When you feel the yearning for a new city- start over. Take 200 bucks and a three suitcases. Work anywhere that will have you. Meet strange people and forget your name. Call yourself Ruby. No one will know the difference. Remember to call your mother. Don’t be selfish. Come home when you find yourself in the strangers and the small one bedroom apartment.
9. Don’t whisper evil things into your own ear. Other people are going to shout them at you. Be your own hero. Keep a sword on your key ring.
10. Don’t step in front of a city bus. It will not be beautiful. Live. Stay up all night with a boy that promises you everything and means it. Live. See shitty local bands with a friend. Wear a different band’s t-shirt. No one will care. Live. Have a baby girl with tiny fingers and tiny toes someday. Pour love into her until it’s overflowing. Live. Wake up. Staying in bed all day is not poetic.
Do you hear that? It’s me. It’s your life. Wake up."
i often fantasize about what it would feel like
if i smashed everything in my room
and burned all my old pictures
and cut off all my hair
and dyed it green
like if i took everything holding me back
and destroyed it all at once so i could be free
but instead i find myself curled up on my bed
mumbling “shut up” to inanimate objects
because i can feel them judging me
I resonate with this deeply.
(via helloladynope)Source: 17yr
It has been ages since I had a proper quiet time or a conversation with God.
It has been three months since I left church.
I have been half avoiding this whole thing.
Truth be told, I am terrified that it is all one big lie. That the glue of my whole life was all made up. Then what am I left with?
I can’t keep losing things one by one. Growing older isn’t fun. And if what that kept me going for the past 24 years is not real, I don’t know how I am going to cope.
So, I rather hold on to the delusion, straddle the fence, seeing how far I can go pretending that it is okay.
Maybe I just need to be brave and take that step. I do owe it to myself to find out. I need to give God a chance before I deem Him as a cheater of feelings.
I do believe there is a God out there. I just don’t know what form he is, or if that really matters.
They don’t teach you this in Sunday school.
The big problem of my generation is feeling like we’re stuck. It all stems from a combination of the instant gratification we’re accustomed to, and the heavily-repeated idea that great things are expected of us.
So what do we wind up with? A generation of burned-out, stressed-out, high-strung kids who have been told that they’re going to rule the world, and all they can do is say “When?”
(via becomingroni)Source: thesuperhumanist
This is the official ‘i care’ symbol. This is how it works:
Basically you reblog this, and your followers know that you care and that they can message you about anything anon or not and you will reply back or at least look at their message.
I have an ask box and an email add, if you ever need a listening ear. <3 Might not be the wisest person or the best advice giver, but I will read and reply.
(via ricochetwaltz)Source: s-u-r-f-e-r
What am I doing with my life?